I got this message from a friend of mine:
Hi, I had an uncomfortable experience last night in a restaurant with another couple. I took out my mindless knitting project to work on between courses when the other couple complained that I was being rude, that my knitting was going to take my attention away from them. Even after I explained how automatically I knit without looking, they were not assuaged. They insisted that knitting should take place in one's home. I stopped knitting, of course, because, as they say, perception is everything. But I wasn't happy. I felt that the other couple had somehow stepped over the line in trying to teach me proper behavior. And I lost many precious hours of work. Has this ever happened to you, my knitter friends? Do you have any comments regarding this confrontation? Please do not hesitate to say what you think.
I answered:
And she said:Hi - not that I agree with them, because I don't consider it rude in that circumstance. But if it made them uncomfortable, then that should be taken into account, and I think you did the right thing by stopping.
Question: do you knit in temple? That question has come up in our Fellowship knitting group (the "UU Ewes").....our minister has said he wouldn't mind, but others disagree.
Thanks for your response to my query. I did stop knitting at the rest't to appease the friends but I was miffed. When we went back to their home afterwards, I left the knitting in the car and felt badly that I was missing so much time. Oh, well. It takes all kinds.
No, I do not knit in temple and never would. That is not a social setting.
Any comments from the Ewes?
Sylvia
2 comments:
When I worked for the insurance company, we had monthly teleconference meetings. I always made sure that I had my current quilting (or substitute knitting) project out on my desk before I picked up the phone to dial in. No one knew what I was doing, they couldn't see me. I actively participated in the meetings and I don't think the quilting detracted from my attentiveness. I think you're right Sylvia when you say that it's all in one's perception, and what one considers to be disrespectful behavior. I would be curious to know your friend's definition of a "social setting" which she uses to differentiate between these two situations.... As long as Rev Paul is on the record as having said that he doesn't mind the knitting, I think each should be free to make their own decision.
I agree it's all in the perception. People who don't knit take it as a personal affront, as though you are not paying enough attention to them. The funny thing is that my mind NEVER wanders when I am knitting during sermons or lectures -- it's almost as though keeping my hands busy helps keep my mind from wandering off the other topic. According to something I read recently, that has a medical basis and is something to do with how the left and right sides of the brain interact. Yet, even though I miss the knitting time, I don't think I would knit during a religious service, if only to preserve the atmosphere of worship. (When I do, I restrict myself to the family room.) Knitting etiquette is certainly an interesting dilemma!
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